31 days and counting.

It's hard to believe that I leave in only a month. The feeling I have in my stomach is the same one that I had when I went bungee jumping years ago. I knew I would be fine, land safely, and walk away empowered and thrilled, but stepping off the ledge was still scary as hell. The good ol' "What was I thinking?!" moment. Well, I think I might be there. Vietnam for a year? Really?

The truth is that despite my overwhelming excitement, I'm also a little nervous and scared. That's what I wanted out of all of this, though. To be a little nervous and scared. I can't remember the last time I was legitimately nervous or scared about doing anything. Which is why I wanted a challenge. To step out of my comfort zone. To go on a journey.... I could have found a way to go back to Europe, but that would have been too easy. I wouldn't have missed a beat. I need to get away from my life and everything that I love and live for a while. Settle myself into a new life, a new place, and experience myself there...

So, to answer my own questions: Yes. Vietnam for a year. Really.

These feelings of mine bring to mind a recently discovered (thanks, Sam) favorite movie of mine, KIKI'S DELIVERY SERVICE. An animated movie by legendary Japanese film maker Hayao Miyazaki, it tells the story of a young female witch who, as tradition has it, must leave her home for a year, find new city to settle in, and discover her "gift". In other words, the story of my present situation. (Except, of course, I'm not a witch. Bummer.) I can't remember if I watched this movie before or after I found out that I received the Fulbright, but it has become the L'AUBERGE ESPAGNOLE of my trip to Vietnam.* Apart from my own identification with KIKI'S, I love the film for so many reasons. The incredibly beautiful (fictional) city that Kiki settles in is a synthesis of Stockholm, Adelaide, the Swedish island of Gotland, Paris, Ireland, and Tokyo. The "black cat" (every witch has to have one!) in the movie is comic, and Kiki's changing relationship to the cat parallels her own growing up. The movie also touches on so many issues of adolescence (that part doesn't relate to me). And, as with many of Miyazaki's films, the protagonist is an empowered, independent female heroine who eventually saves the day (and sometimes even the guy!). Hint hint, Disney.

Enough emotional rambling, though. I just finished re-reading the handbook that Fulbright sent me, informing me of my rights and responsibilities, travel and medical considerations, tips for packing and living abroad, etc. I used pink Post-It page markers to flag things I need to do (I don't like pink), and purple markers to note any interesting, funny or particularly useful information (I suddenly love purple). I came out with a lot more pink than purple. Get tax forms, absentee ballot forms, international health forms. Register myself with the Embassy in Vietnam and my computer with National Registry for Stolen Computers (in case it gets stolen). Etcetera, etcetera and so on and so forth. A lot to do, yes, but the handbook wasn't completely dry. Here are a few of my favorite highlights from the "purples":

• If attacked, escape.
• Learn how to improvise. You can use a needle and thread to make a webbing to hold your valuables behind a curtain in a hotel room. If you balance an ashtray on a windowsill, its fall will alert you to intruders.
  
• Door clubs can be useful for both the home and on the road when staying in hotels.
• The sun is very hot and can burn you.
  
• Iron all clothes that have been hung outside. This kills the larvae of flies before they can burrow into your skin. (That's just gross.)
  
• Ants do not like Ajax. **
  
• A mixture of mashed potatoes and boric acid is lethal to cockroaches but this is a dangerous poison...

I don't know what a door club is, and I hadn't realized they got Macgyver to co-write the handbook. Sewing a pocket in hotel curtains? Come on.

I did learn, though, that mothballs have many uses (keeping my closet from getting mildewy, keeping moths out of my clothes, keeping cockroaches away--who knew they hate the odor of mothballs?). I guess I need to get some mothballs, then. The handbook says to put them in drawers, cabinets, closets and bookshelves. That's a lot of mothballs.

And, thanks to the handbook, I have a newfound fear of cockroaches, who apparently love to live under bathrooms and will eat my clothing, books, furniture, and food. And they can fly. VOMIT.

In better news, it's looking pretty certain that I'll have wireless internet in my building at Nha Trang University. Someone else from the University emailed me, and I asked them about the internet situation (since the Vice Dean didn't really know). I was subsequently assured that there's Wifi in the building. This means I can Skype whenever I want, and Sam and I won't have to break up after all. :)

And let's not forget another important benefit of Wifi: I will be uninterrupted in my Youtube stalking of Sam's travels. Here are some clips from his show last night at the Paradiso in Amsterdam. It's so nice that whenever I miss him, I can just go to Youtube.....






I'm also excited that my super awesome little sister is coming home tomorrow! She's been gone for a week and I'm so happy that she'll be back tomorrow. This is what we did last time we were together:

Gotta love Macbooks....

Maybe I can get her to help me organize my clothes, instructional materials, office supplies insect repellent, and, of course, moth balls. Come to think of it, I don't even know where to buy moth balls. Or boric acid.

*L'AUBERGE ESPAGNOLE is a French film about a young man who studies abroad in Spain. I watched it while I was in Spain, and latched onto it as the loosely-based film adaption of my own time abroad. Although it's a dramatic comedy, I started crying about 5 minutes in and kept blubbering the whole way through. I haven't been able to watch it since I've been back...I miss Spain so much.

**While I was studying abroad I had several interesting encounters with ants. In Italy (fire ants in our bed in Cinque Terre when I was there with Sam), in France, in several cities in Spain. I also had an especially gross incident (involving lots of dead ants in a drink I ordered) right after I got back to the States. None of the incidents were my fault--it seemed like ants were just coming to me--and eventually I wondered if it was a sign of some sort....but I never figured it out what the sign meant. :)